i think i don't have so much luck

coba bayangin
pas masuk SMP gua gagal masuk SMP favorit
pas UN gua ngedown
pas hasil UN dibagiin gua nangis kejer karna sedih d
an pas masuk SMA gua gagal masuk SMA yang gua taksir
dan sekarang PPDB jakarta ada gangguan dan gua harus nunggu 2 hari lagi buat dapet kepastian yang seharusnya gua bakal dapet HARI INI
berapa kegagalan yang harus gua tampung untuk itu?

gua suka quotationnya si Zuko di AVATAR itu:
"Everybody loves Azula. They said, she was born with lucky while I was lucky to be born"

i sit in nowhere, in silence

feel cold inside but smile outside

people never know what i feel inside

when i try to rule my world to be tame, and it replies it unkindly

when i rush everything off, i just can't stand

i just try to be kind and find a way to breathe easily

but my life won't let me stand up, it doens't care

like everything goods in my life run away from my hug

you, and those stuffs are gone by the storm

because life will never give me just a wind or breeze

lucky and blessings never give me strength

because they are keeping a distance from my surface

all I got means nothing at all, they're waiting

to be flown and left me undone

they stare at my life like it's clear

they don't realize that there's nothing they need to envy to

i really wish i can have a better story

leaving all the bitterness, fulfill with those air of sweetness

how many times i accepted failures

with a curve shape on my lips

how many times i gasped and touched my chest

whispered to my self to be more and more mighty

how many times i felt down and stopped my tears

just to find any other way to move forward

if sunshine still there

call my speechless heart, break my silence

in the night side i'm moaning and asking help

and no one will hear, no one will give me hands

sedih amat ye ga? berasa hidup udah kaga ada harapan -_- konyol
tapi tadi gua bener bener ada semangat hidup dari temen gua, hazra gua bener bener terharu baca smsnya. nih gua tulisin buat lo (PS: ada linknya silahkan pencet di nama "hazra")

Nis, lo daftar ke Jakarta ya? Fight Nis, fight fight fight!! Nis, inget Nis, BUKAN SEKOLAH YG AKAN MEMBAWA LO KE PARIS, TAPI DIRI LO SENDIRI! Berjuang ya Nisa, gue berdoa semoga lo dapet yg terbaik :3

sumpah gua terharu banget. gua langsung berkaca kaca gitu dengernya. mungkin bener, yangua butuhin cuma ngerelain ini semua, jalanin aja apa yang ada sekarang

lagian apa gunanya sih nyesel sekarang? toh UN nya udah 3 bulan yang lalu -_-
ikhlasin aja lah nis. mungkin udah jalan dari sananya

(ibarat di foto ini, gua mencari cari penghidupan dan jalan yang pasti di dunia yang... grayscale dan monoton) <-- dahsyat bahasanya