How does it feel being the oldest...

Assalamualaikum Warahmatullah!

It's been a month since the last post I wrote here, ya. Honestly, I get some lack-of-writing skills nowadays because the hello-school-life! phenomenon.

So, is it so far so good? About school? Gimana yang naik kelas 10, gimana rasanya di MOS? Ospek? MOPDB? Ada kakak-kakak kelas yang kece maksimal sampe bikin hati ngilu? Atau mulai ada kakak kelas yang ngelirik lo dengan tatapan "ih-minta-dibully-banget-lo"? Gimana rasanya pake seragam putih abu-abu? It should be awesome, personally, putih abu-abu itu adalah suatu tanda kalo lo menempati kasta tertinggi di jenjang wajib belajar (yang sekarang jadi 12 tahun), jadi rasanya agak incredible untuk mengenakan seragam itu. Congrats and enjoy!

Untuk yang kelas 11, gimana nih? Jurusannya udah cocok? Bagi yang IPA, PR-nya udah banyak belom? Bagi yang IPS, udah bisa adaptasi sama lingkungannya belom? However, 11th grade is actually a great time, when you can be a real youngster and live your young days to the fullest. How does it feel having senior and junior in the same time? You can be much active as you want, you can come home late because you have an organization to handle, you are young, so live your young life as well or regret that later!

And the last one, hello 12th graders! How does it feel being the oldest ones?

Yang jelas, pasti sibuk dan mulai dibayangi nasihat dari guru-guru. Just like those I got from the teachers:

"You just can't stay at your place when you can't see the whiteboard well. You can come to the front, you're now 12 graders, you can't just sit and pasrah!"

"You must speak Indonesian well until 31 August 2013, because our purpose is not using the correct and good language, but our purpose is to fight against national examination"

"Because in the second semester our time will be less, I want us to finish all the lessons at the first semester"

Setiap guru yang masuk bilang hal yang sama. Melulu nyambung ke betapa sempitnya waktu yang kita punya, betapa kesiapan kita dibutuhkan buat lulus UN, dan betapa harus kerja kerasnya kita buat masuk PTN. Di balik semua nasehat itu ada satu suara asing yang bergema di relung-relung jiwa procrastinator gua: "Siapkah saya?"

I know I still have so much difficulties in facing math, chemistry, and physics. Especially in physics, ilmu gaib ini hampir selalu sukses membuat gua feel lower than anyone. 

But at least, I think it's the right time to deal with fears: matematika, kimia, fisika. Sekarang, di saat in need banget, gua harus sedikit demi sedikit mem-push diri gua sendiri untuk memukul mundur (serentetan) kegagalan yang gua alami dulu. Once someone told me, everything depends on your mind set -- segalanya tergantung apa yang kamu set di pikiran kamu.

Like,  a success person ever failed but didn't stop trying.

Honestly, truly, madly, and insanely, I have to admit that saying "MATH IS EASY", "PHYSICS IS JUST A PIECE OF CAKE", "CHEMISTRY CAN BE SOLVED WITH CLOSED EYES" will make me look like a naive person. But at least, I'll try myself to change a mind set that those three lessons are not those you need to over-worried. A mind set that how painful my brain will be, I will not stop studying. A mind set that how strong those push me back, I will not surrender.

.......... Eh kok jadi curhat ya.

So let's skip a sorrow creeping behind the posts.

Beberapa minggu ini, gua mulai menjalani hari-hari sebagai sesepuh di sekolah. Rasanya bittersweet - pahit manis. Pahit bahwa waktu begitu cepat dan gaada waktu lagi buat banyak leha-leha. Manis menyadari bahwa gua menempati kelas yang gua pengen dari dulu.

Menurut penilaian dangkal gua, jadi kelas 12 berarti jadi penguasa kantin, bisa duduk di kantin selama mungkin, dan juga bisa jalan di tengah lapangan tanpa dilemparin granat dari lantai 4 dan ditimpa rasa malu yang efeknya bombastis. Gimanapun, gua menganggap kelas 3 itu semacam kasta brahmana-nya anak SMA, dimana adek kelas itu cuma semacam waisya dan sudra. Agak-agak dangkal sih emang...

Di balik semua akses konyol yang dirasain anak kelas 12 kayak bebas ngaca di toilet sampe mata pegel, nongkrong di kantin sampe disamperin wakasek kesiswaan, dan bebas berlenggang lenggok melenggang di tengah lapangan (ya, konyol dan dangkal), tentunya beberapa kelas 3 khususnya cowok, sibuk berburu dara muda, anak-anak baru kelar MOS. Semakin keliatan ngerayunya si senior cowok, semakin mudah cewek-cewek hasil baru OSPEKan ini untuk terlena dan akhirnya menyerah. Menyerah jadi bahan PHP-an, have fun, atau bahkan jadi cinta sejati sang senior. *uhuk

Kalo ngomong soal SMA emang gapernah ada abisnya, termasuk kegiatannya. SMA itu adalah saat dimana remaja stubborn dapat mengeluarkan uneg-uneg dan apresiasinya menjadi sebuah acara atau kegiatan. Salah satu diantara kegiatan ini demo ekskul, acara yang mempertemukan senior dan junior secara langsung buat pertama kali.

Like what we did last year, we started taking tables and chairs, brought it to the field, made some stands, and decorated ours. We performed our best to get the newbies attention. Just as simple as that, but always fun. Behind those noisy voices, deep inside, sorrow did exist. This, insya Allah, is gonna be the last perform of us using uniform.

I still remember the first time I got there, I sat on the field with a new uniform. Seragam baru yang kerahnya masih kaku dan roknya megar kayak Cinder....amata. Dengan serius ngeliatin satu-satu ekskul yang tampil dan mampir ke setiap stand. Sampe akhirnya gua berhenti di stand fotografi... Dan minta formulir. Just like a snap and now I'm on the 4th floor, being a senior.

Time flies, surely flies.

 Demo Ekskul 2012

"Each of you have 3 years contract in 85, make sure you go away at the right time, as well, and have a better place to have a contract in later" -- Pak Sunaryo Surya.

Time surely flies.

I'm hoping myself can finish the contract as well and have a better place to have a contract in. Perguruan Tinggi Negeri.

Because I have dreams in my head, I bring so much hope on my shoulders, and I'm followed by those who care about my future: Family, Kakdaus, and friends.

It's a great job to not disappoint them and even myself.

Not this time, not again.

  

Happy fasting, may God bless and accepts our prays as well. Aamiin.